vibrant life

thanksgiving...

We had a wonderful, moving Thanksgiving service at church last night.  It is an annual tradition at our church to meet the evening before Thanksgiving and lift our praises in song, testimony, and hearing of the Word.  Pastor Dale had an excellent meditation.  (I am hoping that it was recorded so that I can post a link here soon.)  My mother gave a beautiful testimony of thanksgiving to God and Meghan (who had previously told me she didn't want to speak in front of church) surprised us all and gave a truly moving and heartfelt testimony about what this last year has meant to her.  She spoke off the top of her head and from her heart and it was such a great testament to the work of the Holy Spirit and God's grace in her life.  Praise the Lord!!  (Unfortunately because she didn't have it written down I can't share it here with you but I am hoping that it was recorded as well.)  I also wrote a testimony that I shared during the service which I will share here...

I’m sure it is not surprising to any of you that I would choose to write a testimony of thanksgiving this year. It has been abundantly clear throughout this past year that our family has much to be thankful for. Last year at this service we sat here blissfully unaware of what was approaching.  We had no idea at that time that an aggressive, deadly cancer was growing in Meghan's arm.  One week from tomorrow (Thanksgiving Day) marks the one year anniversary of a routine doctor’s appointment that literally changed our lives. An appointment that set into motion a year of uncertainty, struggle, pain, and many tears. But also a year of numerous blessings, deep joy, abiding love, and a deeper understanding of who we are in Christ. No one wants to hear the news that your child has cancer. No one wants to see their precious child suffer or see their other children cope with things beyond their understanding. We don't claim to fully understand why our family was called to walk through this particular trial but we can testify to God’s unwavering faithfulness to us through it all. Among the many things I am grateful for this year are ...

• the fact that Meghan is sitting here with us tonight because the Lord saw fit to grant her more time on earth with us.  Her cancer is in remission and she is moving forward with much hope for the future.
• my wonderful husband of 20 years who steadfastly led us through the past year with His eyes constantly fixed on Jesus (and as a side note had an amazing ability to keep us all laughing even when our hearts were breaking).
• my children  - Meghan whose courageous and positive spirit taught me so much this past year about trusting God in the darkest of times, and Eric, Lauren, Rileigh, and Aidan who rallied around their sister and each other and in the process learned so much about selflessness and compassion.   
• our extended family, particularly our parents, who have been a great support and encouragement in word and deed.
• a gracious and generous church family here at Harvest that has enveloped us in love and support and was used by God to provide for us in incredible ways.
• the power of prayer and the amazing family of believers around the world (literally, around the world!) that lifted up prayers and petitions for us.
• the excellent medical staff and facilities we are blessed with right here in GR.
• our employers who were supportive, understanding, and flexible.            
• the many awesome children and families that we got to know and love and walk alongside up on the oncology unit.  We were given opportunities to look beyond ourselves and our circumstances and reach out to others.
• God's precious Word - what a wondrous gift that has given to us to lead and sustain us through all of life!
• the overwhelming sense of peace God granted to us.  Michael often reminded me that no matter what the outcome, Meghan would be healed.  I am grateful that for now He chose to do that here on earth but I am more grateful that through Christ not only Meghan but all of us who believe will be healed eternally.
• and the list could go on and on.  Even the small blessings of every day - the laughter, beauty, and joy in life's details that have become more cherished and recognized through this experience.

But amidst trying to put into words the gratitude I feel (which is completely overwhelming)  I have to stop and ask myself the question - what if the outcome had been different? What if the outcome in the future is different? Would I still be able to stand before you with a sincerely grateful heart?  1 Thessalonians 5:18 says, "In everything [everything!!] give thanks; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."  It is only by God's grace that we can do this.  So really at the core - that is what I am the most thankful for this year - His grace and mercy to me, a sinner.  He has shown me that in my weakness, He is strong.  In my doubt, He is faithful.  In moments of turbulence, He is peace.  Amidst uncertainty and unknowns, He is sovereign and unchanging.  How blessed we are to rest in the hands of the Almighty - to be sheltered under His wings.  And this not because of anything we have done but because of what Christ has done on our behalf!  This year my heart truly thrills to say to you, along with the psalmist in Psalm 34:3, "Glorify the Lord with me, let us exalt His name together."  

Wishing you all a blessed Thanksgiving
filled with gratitude and praise to God!

more photos...

You may remember that my lovely friend Terri recently did some photos for our family (you can see them here).  She got some really great shots of Meghan and we are thrilled to have such beautiful photos to document this time in Meghan's (and our) life.  She also just sent me some additional photos that I love...





You'll have to stay tuned for one of my favorites from the shoot - it's a very special (and secret) family shot that we'll be using for a special project coming up! 

new news...

I realized today that it has been over 3 weeks since I've updated here!  So for those of you still checking in... I apologize!  I suppose you could just assume that no news = good news.  We are just plugging along with life and still all adjusting to the changes of Meghan's treatment slowing down and Mom being back at work and kids all being in school.  It is interesting how even just small things - like planning meals and cooking every night - are an adjustment after having a year that was so sporadic in that department.  Don't get me wrong - it's all very good - just taking time to re-acclimate!

Meghan's hair continues to grow - what a joy it has been to see (and rub) it!  (And boy, do people want to rub it!  It seems to possess the same kind of magnetic power as a pregnant woman's belly!)

Aidan decided that Meghan needed some company for this photo (do you see Yoda on her shoulder?)
  
Speaking of Aidan, he recently enjoyed a field trip to the apple orchard...
  

Yesterday and today (Monday and Tuesday) the kids had off from school.  Other than Meghan's physical therapy appointment yesterday afternoon, they are thoroughly enjoying just hanging out at home together and playing all sorts of goofy games.  I have also enjoyed a couple of running-around-free days as well.  Although it has really hit me how very exhausted I feel.  When things are busy you just keep pushing through it because you don't really have a choice.  But watch out when things slow down - it really hits you like a ton of bricks.  I am just physically, emotionally, and spiritually exhausted.  It seems somehow ironic or strange to me that I'm feeling that way now when based on circumstances I should be feeling refreshed and energized and ready to move forward.  (Or maybe I'm just expecting too much too soon??)  Anyway, all these new choices in life seem a little overwhelming to me at the moment.  I'd feel better if I just could at least feel like I'd "caught up" on everything from the last 10 months. 
I know - patience, peserverance, and prayer!  There are always lessons needing to be learned aren't there? 

Just a few random things to mention:

• For those of you following (and praying for) Ethan McGraw's family, his mother Jennifer has started a new blog you may be interested in.  You can find it here.
• We finally heard back from Make-A-Wish.  I won't bore you with all the details but they are unable to do the backyard make-over in the way that Meghan had imagined so Meghan has decided to go with her second choice - a trip to Disney.  So seriously - who's going to complain about that?  We are all very excited!
• Rileigh is in the process of allergy testing.  Please pray that we get some good answers and a course of treatment when we meet with the specialist on December 4.
• Meghan's physical therapist (knowing of Meghan's desire to hopefully play on the volleyball team in January) arranged for her to practice with the GRCC Women's Volleyball Team recently.  She had a great time!  Thanks Beth!
• We had our first snowfall here in Michigan (thankfully it has already melted!).
• Michael and I have our 20th Highschool Class Reunion later this month.  As I recently posted on Facebook, I am somewhat horrified by the sad realization that there is no way I'm going to lose 100 pounds before the reunion in 3 weeks, lol!